High-Attitude Flight (fan comic)

Some may remember this project of mine from SoC. So for those and any new readers, here is my first fan comic. I will add any upcoming pages to this post so you get an easy read.
Though it´s Elfquest fanart, the characters are taken from Oakleaf Holt. Since this is my first comic, I didn´t want to mess with any original characters. I´m still struggling with scripting and gathering first experiences with sequences and visual story telling, so feedback of any kind is very welcome. Anyways, I hope you enjoy story, art and characters and keep following.



                           

First, the visuals are great! I thought it flowed very nicely! (And I am in love with Hawk's lovemate, she looks beautiful! Very much like Nightfall, when she's not wearing her head piece; and Nightfall just happens to be my favorite female ElfQuest character!) The only thing that stopped me (and not even stopped, more of a minor speed bump) in the reading was some of the dialogue. Some of the dialogue seemed very "modern" (or that's how I read it), like when one of them said "Whatever." That to me, came across modern sounding. And there's a few other small, modern type writing that seemed "out of place" if you will in the ElfQuest world. But other than that, I am amazed! I just wish that the pages had a "Next Page" type thing for easier reading! But having them available to click from this page and opening a new window was painless enough!

Added a new page.

@Tymber: You´re right about the language, it´s more modern than we use to read it in EQ comics. That is for two reasons. First, I´m no native English speaker, the English I´ve learned is for modern use and writing in a more fairytale kind of style is quite hard to me. The other reason (or rather my excuse) is that this story is staring holt characters, so I try to keep the language true to them as they appear in the roleplay.
I´m a better artist than author, and admittedly, the language was one of my major reasons that kept me from doing a fan story with canon characters, as I struggle with writing so much and didn´t wanna mess it up. Holt characters are a bit more forgiving there. I hope so are you.

Besides the fact it looks awesome and is well done, two main things that jumped out at me: MUCH more pleasing to read than the current 'official' comics (infinitely better pacing and storytelling), and the fact it's actually THERE and has progress being done on it. I've wanted to get back into making comic strips, and while I have a large number of plans, I never get anywhere on it. It's great to see someone actually produce a well made fan comic!

Aside from the verbiage used due to translation (which I don't have an issue with, being a reader of manga and other things), I don't see too much wrong with it. The only thing that kind of confused me was that in the description of Hawk, I got the impression of someone who wasn't as much of a prankster as depicted in the story. Many of the things he was doing (pushing Foxtrail off the waterfall, laying on him, being mildly annoying) were slightly meaner compared to what we see of Foxtrail than I would have thought by the description. Foxtrail's description made me think that he'd be the one doing these things, but he seems passive-aggressive in comparison.

Nevertheless, it make for a great story and enjoyable reading experience.

I LOVE IT!!!



I'm not lying or exaggerating when I say this Dreamcat... but I'm thoroughly enjoying your comic far more than Final Quest. Maybe because yours has that "personal" touch that seems to missing in FQ to me, and the fact that your facial expressions tell even MORE than the dialogue. I LOVE that!!!!

*praying to the High Ones you're doing more*

Page 13 is up now.

Thank you so much for reading and praising. It means really a lot to me! <3

@Trollhammer: You´re right, Hawk is more annoying than he´s expected to be, but that´s kinda part of the story. As pictured on the latest page, he actually has a quite guilty conscience about it (other than Foxtrail, who apparently pulls the same pranks shamelessly over and over again), and because this behaviour is so unusual to him, he thinks it has driven Foxtrail away.